Inspiration!

First, I'll cut to the chase by skipping my usual 'sorry it's been a while' crap.
I have been working in a secondary school now as a permanent teacher, and the workload had really weighed me down a lil.
It's not easy to balance getting a Masters degree and simultaneously getting your day-to-day tasks checked.
However, I'm glad to say I am fortunate to have my family's full support and my bf's love to fuel me.
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Announcement: I'm checking off my bucket list one by one!
Hahaha, sounds more like a big review, but I promise you it's legit... somewhat.
I don't really have a bucket list, so well, I sort of borrowed my bucket list from others.
It's all pretty similar, right? Doing things that you would like to do before you kick the bucket in the end...
FIRST, challenging my own fear of heights.
I'm going skydiving! Gahhhh!
Definitely sounds surreal to me ever since the minute I signed myself and a few of my friends up.
Well, that's the first of many to come.
Hopefully, I'll get the chance to update my blog more frequently.
Go Wendy! Whoooo!
-Self-cheering is so cheesy tho. But Yey Me!-
Till next time.

A recent Chinese Orchestra performance I've been to

😍

With love,
Wendy

To my first ever mid-life "crisis"

Well, I'm not really reaching a mid-life "crisis" pe say, more like a mid-life "questioning".
So I am now shaping my path towards education in language and music.
But questions flowed in my head when I begin to wonder if I'm doing the 'right' thing for my future.
Say for instance, how could you be sure or certain about the things you do and how can you guarantee 'success' from it?

(yea, I know, success is such a big word!)
Which brings me to my point.
What do I want in life?

Everybody wants to live a nice peaceful life without needing to worry about basic needs.
Some would even go to the extend to achieve more when they're young, to be lazy when they are old.
They call it the passive income. (another big word!)
Well, Sheng and I had been through several 'business' models that attracted us with the aforementioned passive income.
But so far, we had not found one that is suitable for us.
I stumbled upon this Singaporean blog I'd like to share to all > Be inspired. Be A Champion
And I'd say, I've learnt a lot reading from this.
To practicalise this, there's still some gaps to be filled.

Back to my own story, well, I think what I can do right now, is to focus on getting my basic needs first.
I tend to get distracted at times, but I do hope I'm on the right track.
Well, what's the worse case scenario anyways...
But I'm definitely not satisfied enough with my current lifestyle.
More to go, there's definitely more to go...

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On a less serious side note, if you guys are ever in BM central market, do give this place a try!
It's a 煮炒 place where they serve incredible food.
It's called the 兴利 restaurant.

Kitchen manned by two brothers

 

Famous dished include the steamed fish, fried brinjal and fried tofu.

Well, we finished it in no time. 

It was delicious. 

To the beautiful people out there, stay strong, stay lovely. 

Signing off
JCG

Life in Progress!

Whew, I've been wanting to do some of my personal stuff for some time.
For example, editing videos, blogging, and many more.
One thing I'm proud of myself for doing is that I exercise... Everyday!
But yea, food intake wise, that's another ball game.
Hence, the stagnant of my body weight. Heee...

Anyways, coming back to topic, I have so many things lined up for me.
But yesterday, I had finally closed some of the open files.
I've edited 3 videos in one go!
Which took me for about 3 hours (I've been doing my work while I was waiting for the render)
So, I'm happy of that!

Then I think to myself, when work actually comes, it demands such a big part of you.
Time is of the essence they say, but how do you actually spend it is what makes everything worth while.
Take for example, me writing this blog!
I may not have a million views or likes, but I'm happy that I got to put a small part of my life experience here to share with those of you who checked my blog.
Thank you so much for stalking me, I love you guys. :)

Sometimes, taking time to do your own stuff is satisfaction itself.
Now that I've completed some of my to-dos, I feel much relieved.
No regrets people! That's how I wanna live mah life.
Peace!

Obligated selfie post with new Taiwan boots!

Thanks to my cousins K&K!

This is one of the videos I was talking about. 

My silly friends and me enjoying ourselves at Jason's Bro's Wedding!

Bunch of awesome people they are. :D

Signing off
JCG

Searching for myself

Well, it's been a month since I've written.
Yes, I miss the times when I could just sit down and write about anything that comes to mind.
But now, with so many plannings, preparations and work going on...
Yea, I still have free time, I'm just a lazy b*tch.

Well, convocation's this Saturday, so that's new.
Excited? Perhaps, but still, the last hurdle before entering society for real.
Which brings me to my dilemma, finding the right career.

I'm pretty tied up so far, working on off in projects, researchers, and others.
I'm also taking my teacher's course in music.
Well, at times I could be really free and at times, I would stay up late nights to finish off work.

I am shaping my future towards education, but I'm not too sure if that's what I want.
People around me advised me to go for what you CAN, instead of what you WANT to get me up on my feet.
While I agreed to that to some point, I just can't shake the feeling of me wanting to do so much more in life!
I want to write articles, I want to learn and meet exciting people and stuff, I want to travel...
So many things I've wanted, but is it for me?

That's why lately I've been bubbling myself into vacation plannings & field trips.
It's like my go-to escape plan to explore the world without actually needing to stray too far away from my future career now.
Who know where I'll end up next.

When in doubt, I actually stumbled on this article on career choices, if you are facing some sort of career problem, you can definitely look it up.

Finally, I'd like to say, what I'm going through is something pretty common.
But it is something new to me, so I need time to adjust to everything.
I know that no matter what we do, we just gotto inject some fun, humour and life into it...
And voilà, life's beautiful again!

What better way to end a blog with a chicken selfie!

Bak Bak! hehehehehehehehe

(Taken after my taman run - training for Penang Marathon yo! 7km!)

Signing off,

JCG

Changed Interface!

Yey!
Finally it's done!
Even tho I spend a hour and a bit more on this rather than doing work, I'm so totally proud of it.
Made myself a Big A$$ Banner!
Whadayathink?
X)

Have a great day beautiful people!

Signing off,
JCG

Happy Goodbyes

I was proud of myself when I told my roommate CK, "No, I won't feel sad because I'm leaving, I feel neutral."
Yes, that was a few days back when I think that those grads crying and sobbing is overrated.
Now that I'm going to leave the comfort -no, it's not comfortable at all here, it's freaking hot- safety of my hostel, I felt the weight of it all.
Suddenly, I felt lost. 

Days before my final exam, I was already busying myself with job applications, resumes and such.
I was so sure that with a job in hand, I would feel good about myself, I would feel proud and happy, even though I'm leaving USM.
But I woke up today, and looked around my room, I felt unsure.
Running my hands on the once bed bugs infested walls, looking around at that dim atmosphere of the room, lit by redness from our window curtains, and finally resting my gaze on my sleeping roommate, I felt a sudden pang of reality.
I'm going to leave this place for good.

I'm going to miss the morning calls by the birds living on top of our ceiling, the birds we once hated so much to the extend we threw objects to the ceiling to quiet them down.
I'm going to miss the walks to school crossing over SK school, where there's always a crowd of busy people rushing to their classes and I'll have to bump everyone to get through.
I'm going to miss our lecture sessions, trying to pay attention in class, talking behind the lecturer's back, sharing private jokes between ourselves.
I'm going to miss our lunch dates, we would just walk a 5 minutes down to Red House and we would share a joyfully 'loud' lunch, complaining about our school work or just plain blow water '吹水'.
I'm going to miss our after lunch hideaway at our school's resource room, where we care not about the resourcefulness of the room, but of the kind and cooling air-con and their computers.
I'm going to miss the walks / drives out to our school, towards that familiar street with 4 fast food restaurants, but we'd still complain there's nothing nice to eat around here.
I'm going to miss times when we would BBQ in front of lake Harapan, and the cheap booze we would sneak in to couple with our meals and sauce, just to relax and enjoy the Biawaks swimming around us.
I'm definitely going to miss the long endless sessions of talk my friends and I share, talking about school, about life, about love, about friends, about dreams and about sex. *wink*

There's a famous Chinese saying that goes by 人面不知何处去，桃花依旧笑春风, signifying the habitual rhythm of life that runs everyday, but the familiar faces we once associate with are no longer there.
I think what I miss most, is the safeness of this place, not the place itself.
I like the way that I could just walk down a flight of stairs to search for my coursemates, H&M (Hannah & Meiyin)
I feel safe when I'm surrounded by familiar faces in class, the always sleeping KS sitting beside AG and always talking Jacky.
Of course, I cannot forget the limb Chiaying, always wishing for the class to end early, and the always writing Casey, always wishing he could write faster while his other hand busied himself with tissues.
Tommy, who's always secretly planning on which next country he would like to visit and BBQ at.
Shashee, the forever loving girl who would always say goodbyes with a hug.
Bingqian, the Chinese from China who's always in cool clothing but in sweat from her walking 30 mins to school.
Fidah & Rou, where I would usually chat through FB, but I secretly feel proud because I can mix around with them.
Of course, my cute and slightly plumb roommate CK along with my next door neighbors Yumei & Meiyee, who shared so many food with me!
And many more which their names are not mentioned here.
The SAFENESS of my friends being beside me, to care for me and to remind me that we have yet to complete assignments and stuff.

BUT, I would prefer not to miss them.
I prefer happy goodbyes and 再见s, which meant we will definitely see each other again.
We might feel lost now that we have to go on with life and to take on jobs, careers and responsibilities.
But I'm sure, no matter how hard life might take us, we would still look back today and say that, I had a wonderful Uni life.
Sad? Perhaps, but it's a proud moment of being sad.
But there will still be chances we'll meet together, play together and have fun together.
Till we meet again my silly friends.

Signing off,

JCG

Magical Lunch Box

The other day, I saw a video shared on Facebook on this magical multifunctional cooking lunch box. 

Needless to say, being the kid in me, I thought this would be a good chance for me to show off my 'mamasak' skills.

And, I thought it would come in handy since I'm now still living at my hostel, where the only foods you can get are the ones which are fried or in heavy curry santan (coconut milk). 

So when I saw a deal on Groupon selling this little baby, I bought it instantly for RM59. 

It arrived 1 week later. 

Off to cooking!

The exterior of the box

My little baby, which is really small in size

I like the way it cooked using water

I would just have to prepare the meals I want, add in water, and the 'lunch box' would heat / steam my meals to perfection!

I started off with a simple steam egg

The opening of the steam egg

Yey it worked!

Added some soya sauce and some spring onion and there you have it!

Delectable

I tried steaming some vege later on

Broccoli and Cauliflower 

Done! Under 10 minutes. 

Back at my hostel, I steamed some vege together with eggs for my breakfast

This time the steaming was done in 2 layers, one being the vege, the bottom one being the eggs

Double layer!

Needless to say, a healthy breakfast indeed

Next I tried steaming rice with some mushrooms and Broccoli 

This time the steaming was a bit longer, it took about 20 minutes to get the rice fully cooked

Next, I heated some curry tuna and I ate it together with my mushroom rice

A nice dinner

My room mate and I are definitely going to have a lot of fun playing with this magical lunch box. 

Meals are no longer a problem for us, especially during study week. 

Yey!

Signing off

JCG

I Don't Believe in Feeling Sorrow

I don’t believe in feeling sorrow. It’s not built-in my system. I was trained to be tough whenever we are faced with problems. Strong girls don’t cry, they are for the weak minded, the cry babies, the good-for-nothing bitches. I don’t believe in feeling sorrow.

***

I woke up in a tears-drenched bed, my eyes feeling sore, my body aching from my bad sleeping posture. I did not sleep well. As I peeled away from the locks of my comforter, it suddenly dawned to me, that awful reality which I was trying so hard to forget haunts me again. I put my head into my arms as I struggled against another crying fit, then I willingly forced myself up from my bed. The whole room seemed emptier, even though nothing had changed. My cloths laid casually around my bedroom floor, my dressing table a terrible mess, my bags tossed on to a growing pile...

I did not even bother to brush up, there’s no point in it. I dragged myself to the door and opened it. A burst of fresh air rushed into my stuffy room, but it did nothing to improve my solemn mood. I looked across the neatly tidied hall to their room. Their door was opened, just like it has always been. I used to ask my dad why does he open his door the minute they woke up, he used to joke around saying that it is meant to welcome us in. As that memory slipped by, I felt a jab of pain striking my heart. I’m not sure if I can take it.

Mornings at my home were always so cheerful. I loved the way the sun warms each and every one of our rooms, not as much as blinding it, but just enough to create that warm fuzzy glow. Today, it seemed that the sun was feeling utterly happy, lighting up my house the way it always did. I remembered my mom used to say that a bright room is always good FengShui, it means that good Chi is flowing in our home, it will give good luck and good fortune... How Ironic.

I walked towards their open door and peered inside. I hated the fact that everything looked the same. Their TV set looking right at their miniature sofa in front of their king size bed, and my youngest brother’s additional Tilam just nesting beside it. Towards the corner of the room, my father’s favourite massage chair, positioned and angled perfectly to see the TV set too. I remember days when I would just walk in this room, shouting out to my mom and dad in greeting and just lay in their king sized bed, watching the TV together with them. Gleeful moments when I got to wake up my youngest brother when the sun is up, just to annoy him. Or I could just hoist my legs up the bed as I lay down on the sofa, my mom would surely nag at me for being ‘un-woman-like’...

Everything seemed like a blur now. I walked into that room and sat on that sofa I loved so much, looking at that quiet surrounding, seeping in that eerie silence. I couldn’t believe they could just go like that. It was just too sudden. My memories with them seemed like an on-rolling TV series, so real but yet so made up. As scenes after scenes of our stories fast forwarded in my mind, my head felt like a million tonne. It was just too much and I couldn’t resist. I put my head in my arms and weep uncontrollably...

A sudden knock startled me from my thoughts. I looked up to see my red eyed brother, holding up a newspaper cut out. I took the limp piece of paper from him, the not-so-subtle headline spelling out the hard and cold reality - ‘Parents and youngest son died in car crash’. I looked at him as he started to cry violently. Me, being the eldest, could not do much, but to hug him. I too, cried along with him...

***

I don’t believe in feeling sorrow. But when I woke up from that terrible dream, nothing seemed to matter to me anymore. I ran into that familiar room looking for my mom. She was sweeping the bedroom floor, listening to the morning news. I hugged her as tight as I could and said nothing more.

- A short write up for creative writing class :)

Saying the 'Wrong' Things

Supp guise! It's been quite sometime since my last rant.
This one is an afterthought of something that had happened to me lately.
Yes, it's about 讲错话 -- Saying the 'Wrong' Things

I recently was visited by a fellow friend and I introduced my house as 'just a small place'.
Apparently, my brother pointed it out that I was selling myself too low, which makes me look like boasting.
I have no idea at all that my speech would go such great length to hurt others.
Like the Chinese Proverb,  祸从口出 -- Bad things come out from the mouth.

Anyways, another incident happened again lately about my 'cursed' mouth.
I was at a relative's place and we were talking about dish covers.
As the dish cover at my relative's house was in steel, I said 'our house is so small, we have no place to put (storage) this'
And, it seems like I had done it again.
But this time, I oversold myself, which makes me sounds like I'm being sarcastic.

Well, what have I to say but to say I'm surely not good in saying the right/correct thing at that particular situation.
Many a times, the things I said mean no harm, but to others it seems to matter a lot.
And does this affect our future? People's perception on us? Our image? Our family's image?
(yea, that's a bit too far... But is it though??? -hmmmm....)

I was a bit fed up with myself for being stupid, why am I keep saying the wrong things.
Then, I realized something.
Is it that important to gain other's acceptance, as to the extend that we must say things 'to please'?
I know it's a kind of an over-generalization by saying that this applies to all context, but to be specific, are these important in leisurely conversations with friends and family?

I believe it's hard to please everyone, harder still to be That Person that says everything right.
We are being molded by history and society into believing that people live in community, and we share that common norm or set of values.
We are also programmed to reject any un-normal behaviors, such as people who just don't know how to say the 'right' things.
So how are we going to survive in this world?
By being 'One of Them'.

What if I do not want to be 'One of Them'?
What if I want to just me 'Me'?
What if I like to say things without having people to judge or correct me cause it 'doesn't sound right' or 'it's not polite to say it' or 'people might interpret it like that'...
What if....

The funny thing is, we will never be able to truly live the life we want unless we detach from society.
Which is, ironically, hard as people will not let you leave the society cause it's un-normal.
This feels like a vicious cycle.
This is why peer pressure or 'adult pressure' happens too.
Think of those news where people who are unhappy with their lives choose to end it and think of why cases like these happen...
Cause they don't fit into the society.
It's like how our body's immune system treats foreign objects which enters our body, but are all those foreign objects bad?

Well, that's about it for my rant today.
I know it's kindda depressing, just wanted to get it off my mind for a bit.
But, deep from my heart, I still appreciate those who reminded me of my faulty mistakes, especially my brother.
I know I'm not the smartest, but if the boot fits, I might just give it a go.
But so far, I'm still tersangkut in my own thoughts.

I wanna fight, to be myself tonight. :)

JCG

Sudden Struck of Certainty -- How I KNOW what I want to be

It was a normal day, me having Business Writing class at night time 8-10pm. Ughhh
What I thought to be a boring lecture actually turned into a life changing event!
It started off as a normal resume writing exercise.
With the hectic assignments and exams due weekly, it wasn't actually a big surprise for me.
BUT, what the lecturer said had inspired my thoughts.
"Resume writing in your General English class and resume writing in my class is totally different. My resume writing class would be more in depth, preparing you guys for the real world of working."

I was instantly dumbfound, stumped and a sudden small panicky feeling creep into my lil heart.
Remembering the wise old cracking of my fellow colleague from my past intern place, he stated jokingly, "Half a year till grad? Better start applying for jobs already..."
I went back to my hostel and rang my boyfriend.
"I think we should start sending in our resumes to companies. Look at how many uni students are without jobs, I want to have a job right after uni, I hope you'll consider it too."
He was calm as usual (charming he is), and he solemnly agreed that it was only logical.
Then I started sharing lots of stuff I know about works and how we must go about it.
After I was off the phone with him, back came my roommate...

Being that hothead I am, I told her about my 'big discovery/came through'.
She was nodding her head all along, agreeing with me in a spirited way (yea, she was a hothead too); so both of us were indulged into our own thoughts about our future.
Unable to shake that feeling away, I went to search online for StarJobs.
Yes, I have that habit of googling everything...
Out came the Career Quiz, and out came again, my results.
"Creative Type --You like to express yourself"
I was like --WHUUUTTT is this...
I did not think of myself as the creative type, I am no good with coming out with new ideas or concepts, being innovative and such. No, that's just not me...
Or is it...

I was there, still mind numbingly staring at my laptop for tomorrow's exam, and..
IT HIT ME
I HAD A DREAM!!!
Yes, it was Martin-Luther-King dramatic!
Remembering the old days when I was in secondary school, I would read columns after columns of articles on lifestyle, health care and beauty, articles about relationships and articles about life and philosophies...
I, sub-consciously, collected magazine from 2006 up till now, because I loved them.
They were too precious for me to throw away.
I love to read about the majesty of travel places, the art of communicating, the sounds of nature, and facts of life.
I love to read about the cute and warm moments in a relationship, the serene peace of relaxation tips, the gossip of the day and the stories, oh the beautiful stories...
Stories about life, stories about love, stories about nature, stories about motivation, and I'm an adult now, I'm not afraid to say it, stories about sex. (it's not about the actual act okay, it's about sex in a healthy way, how it improves your relationships, ass outta brains please)

I want to be a columnist.
And I am sure, so sure that the sheer power of it made me wrote this blogpost in the midst of studying for my exam tomorrow, so sure that I know I will do it or die trying, so sure that my mind is now turning with beautiful ideas and spinning at warp speed in planning for my future...

Inspirations do come in bad times.
(suddenly proud of myself for writing a blogpost on 'exam is the time for inspiration' years ago)
But I'm gonna call my mom first thing tomorrow morning to tell her the news!
Hmm, resume ideas...

Resume:
- I keep magazines from 2006 to now
- I wrote an award winning story
- I had a blog since Form 4
- I am sucker for beautifully written pieces
- The StarJob said I am a creative type of person
- You better hire me or else I'm telling mah mom...

JCG